Imagining Thanksgiving in the Crane Universe

Let's permit ourselves a measure of Crane canon sacrilege on this overly-indulgent, flash-introspective holiday. Perhaps we can pretend that some of our favorite Stephen Crane stories were set in the context of a Thanksgiving Day celebration?

We can rework The Red Badge of Courage to take place following President Lincoln's 1863 appointment of an annual, national Thanksgiving. If the soldiers in Red Badge were truly written with the Battle of Chancellorsville in mind, that would place them in April/May 1863. Why not set them forward a few months? Youthful Henry Fleming finds himself as a fresh-faced army cook embroiled in a deep inner battle over whether he's chef enough to prepare a scrumptious holiday feast for the men of the regiment. He fails miserably at the potatoes and delegates preparation of the biscuits and pies, afraid he might burn them. But Henry finds inner strength in time to prepare a successful ration of mutton.

The plot of His New Mittens doesn't need to be changed as much. The child Horace still ruins his mittens, and is scolded by his aunt and mother for lying about it. He sulks and refuses to eat Thanksgiving dinner, ruining the holiday for everyone else. Then he sneaks out attempting to run to California, but only makes it as far as Stickney's butcher shop. Stickney is extremely busy thanks to the last minute holiday rush, but kindly tries to ascertain what Horace's problem is. Horace mumbles, cries and whines until the distracted Stickney thinks he's talking about being starved and beaten at home, so he calls the Police, who call Child Protective Services. Horace is temporarily removed from the home and his mom and aunt are victimized by neighborhood gossip for years to come.

The Open Boat, we don't even have to go there. I'd rather not think of the Thanksgiving meal they'd eat. Maggie A Girl of the Streets? Poor Mags has the worst parents of all time, and her boyfriend's a complete jerk. Maybe we could rewrite the story so Maggie, Jimmie, and Tommie are rescued by a Christian shelter on Thanksgiving Day, and they find a loving home. But then i suppose it would be more like a Dickens story.

Personally i'd like to have Thanksgiving dinner at the Stimson household, as per one of my favorite Crane stories, The Pace of Youth. Lizzie and her mother have brow-beaten Mr. Stimson into inviting his daughter-courting-Merry-Go-Round-operator-employee to the holiday meal. Young Frank gazes amourously at Liz, while Stimson fumes with disapproval. By the time dessert is served, Stimson is trembling while gripping his revolver underneath the table, but a few minutes later he's passed out on the couch, thanks to the tryptophan in all the turkey he's eaten. The young couple goes upstairs to make out and Stimson soon becomes a grandfather.

Okay so i've taken liberties here. I'm not familiar with any Crane stories that specifically take place at Thanksgiving. If you know of any, or have any ideas for rewritten holiday plot lines, please comment below.

I did find one poem from Black Riders that talks about charity, and perhaps it can be applied to the sudden generosity of the winter holiday season. Or perhaps not, so don't use this as an excuse not to give to the bell ringers. Happy Thanksgiving!

Charity thou art a lie,
A toy of women,
A pleasure of certain men.
In the presence of justice,
Lo, the walls of the temple
Are visible
Through thy form of sudden shadows.

More about the why why why...

Ladies and gentlemints, i have not yet begun to promote this blog, so no one is actually reading it. Unless YOU are reading it, then well, well....YOU've got some nerve barging in here when i'm barely dressed! Better throw on some posts before the others get here.

I've been gazing lovingly at this blog, viewing it several thousand times per day. I'm thinking of where it can go. We're not blogging about Hannah Montana here, oh no this is serious literary business. Stephen Crane! If i mess up i risk getting beat down by the legion of Crane fans out there. Well let's not worry, this blog is in crapable hands!!

Perhaps i should introduce myself a tad more. I am presently 28 years old, the same age Crane was when he died. My profession, i am a jerk of all trades. I hold a journalism degree from a fine Jesuit university, but don't worry, you won't find any fine journalism on this blog! I run an online variety magazine & small literary press called LitVision, and i'm a member of the activist writers group, the Underground Literary Alliance (ULA). So god bless all here, buy me a drink sometime!

My Crane journey began in the sixth grade. I'd already proven myself unready for foreign language class, so while the other kids were parlez vousing and habling espanol, i was assigned to a special class called Reading. Now, i guess this was supposed to be a punishment, but sitting around reading books, disccussing them and writing about them was a dream come true for me. Some times we had books assigned, but other times the teacher let us pick something out of the skool library. I wandered the shelves and twirled the rack til i found a nice looking paperback with a dark cover and a photo of Civil War soldiers on the front. Pretty cool, and it wasn't even that long so i checked it out.

After reading The Red Badge of Courage i was already hooked on Stephen Crane, so i went to the public library and found an old copy of Maggie A Girl of Da Streetz and other stories, which i enjoyed even more than The Red Badge. I then spent the rest of my teen years seeking out and reading just about everything in the Crane canon. So you could say i gave Stephen Crane the best years of my life!

Even as my brain chemistry morphed from kid-dumb to adult-dumber, the works of Stephen Crane still held up. In fact his writing comes across with increased power every time i read it. He didn't have much time to perfect his craft, perhaps a dozen years? Yet Crane's best writings still outshine those of any other writer. At least, that's my opinion, and that's why i care, 108 years after Crane's death.

Come Worship Stephen Crane With Me!

Hello men! And what was that other one....oh yeah, women! Welcome all to The Red Blog of Courage! My name is Patrick and i'm the member of the near non-existent group, the Crane Crusaders, aka www.stephencrane.org Mainly though i'm just a regular guy who discovered Stephen Crane's writing in the sixth grade, and i haven't been the same since!

I get so many nice emails from readers of the Crane Crusaders site that i thought it would be fun to have an interactive aspect. So yeah...a blog. Original i know, but this could very well be the first full-time dedicated pure form Google spied Stephen Crane blog in existence. As the late Anna Nicole Smith once said, about me, "He's freeeekin genius!" Ok maybe she was talking about someone else, can anyone say for sure?

I do know my chief rivals in Crane worship, the ahem Stephen Crane Society, have had a Question & Answer forum going on for years. I enjoy reading that! The students section is mostly kids wanting Dr. Wertheim to do their homework for them, which is actually a pretty good idea. I mean he is actually smart and learned and all, and knows what he's talking about (unlike me). However this blog isn't about Q & A, it's about issues & tidbits related to our hero Stephen Crane.

So drop a comment below & say hi, as i Hulk myself up for some Crane Mania!